Chapter 6

Sunday, May 24, 1987

Despite all of the activities of the day before, Trixie woke up at six thirty and couldn’t go back to sleep. When she couldn’t stand lying in bed any longer, she quietly got up and took a shower. She needed to clear her mind and reflect on yesterday’s events.

Part of her was ecstatic that she and Jim were moving forward in their relationship but another part worried they would never get through the issues that had broken them up in the first place. Trixie left a note for Honey and Diana, telling them that she was going to take a walk and then head back to the farm to get ready for church with her parents. She placed her bag next to the door and also asked them to see if Mart or Brian would bring it home.

She wanted to leave a note for Jim as well but didn’t know how to get it to him without Brian finding out. She had just gotten to the kitchen door when she heard her name whispered from behind her.

“Were you going to leave without saying goodbye?” Jim asked as he made his way over to her.

Knowing that she needed to be honest with him, she said, “I couldn’t sleep and I didn’t want to wake you. I left a note for Honey. I’m going to take a walk in the preserve and then head back home to get ready for church.”

“Would you like some company?” Jim asked.

Trixie hesitated. She would have loved to go on a walk with Jim but she knew she needed the time to think.

She grabbed his hands and squeezed them. “As much as I love walking through the woods with you, I think I need to have some time to myself. I hope you understand.”

Jim pulled her into a comforting embrace. “I really do. Does that mean we can’t get together later and do something?”

Trixie wanted to do something with Jim but she knew that for now she wanted that something to be an activity that wouldn’t tempt her to go places where her heart wasn’t ready to go to yet.

“Well, thanks to your help earlier, I’m done with my homework, although I could start studying for my chemistry and math finals,” she started. “I was thinking about going for a run later today to get rid of some of my nervous energy.”

Jim glanced at Trixie in surprise. He had never known her to be much of a runner.

“Don’t look so shocked, Mr. Frayne. I took a life sports class for P.E. this semester and one of the things we had to do was run at least a mile three times a week. At first I hated it. I couldn’t get used to the pounding and the jiggling but with an investment in some good running shoes and a few tips from the teacher I began to love running. I’ve done a lot of thinking. It’s so peaceful. Glen Road isn’t that busy and the trip to Mr. Lytell’s store and back is about a mile and a half.”

“That sounds like fun,” said Jim. “I just hope you don’t leave me in your dust. Why don’t we meet after lunch? Hopefully, it won’t be too hot.”

The two exchanged a quick kiss and Trixie left to be with her own thoughts. She decided to forgo her walk in the preserve and headed back to the farm. As she bounded up the steps to the kitchen door, she looked out in the orchard to see if Reddy was ready to come in. Then she realized that he would never be coming in again. It didn’t hurt as bad today as it did yesterday and she knew tomorrow it would be even easier.

The Beldens enjoyed a nice morning at church followed by Sunday dinner with just the family. Everyone noticed that Reddy wasn’t there to greet them when they came home or to get under their feet as they tried to set the table. Over dinner they discussed whether they would get another dog. It was Bobby who voiced what everyone was thinking.

“I’m not ready for a new dog,” he said. “I think we need to have some time to get over Reddy before we get a new one. Besides, with everyone home this summer and Hallie here for half of it, I don’t think it would be fair to the dog. Maybe this fall or next spring would be better.”

After the dishes were done and the food put away, everyone scattered to do their own thing. Mart went over to Mr. Maypenny’s to study physics with Dan. Bobby had to do a few last minute things for their Memorial Day float. Brian was waiting for Honey to join him and Trixie went upstairs to change into shorts, a jogging bra, and her running shoes. The temperature outside was pushing eighty degrees again and she knew by the time she finished her run, she would be drenched.

When she came down the steps, Brian looked at her and his jaw dropped. At first Trixie’s attire shocked him, then he realized how toned her body had gotten over the last year. He worked his jaw, trying to decide if he should say anything. “Trixie,” he started, and then he stopped. He had seen even skimpier outfits at school. Trixie winked at him as she went out the door, appreciating that he didn’t say anything to her.

Trixie was stretching her legs using the steps of the terrace when Jim came up from behind her. He admired her firm back side and slim body. He noticed her newly toned body and appreciated the work she had done to get it that way.

Trixie turned around and caught Jim staring at her. She knew exactly what he had been doing and called him on it. “Did you enjoy the view?” she asked.

“Definitely,” he replied as he placed a kiss on her forehead.

After a few more minutes of stretching, the two took off. They started slowly and then Jim allowed Trixie to set the pace. He figured he would have to adjust his stride and speed to accommodate Trixie’s. Much to his surprise, he found it somewhat of a challenge to keep up with her.

When they were close to Mr. Lytell’s store, Jim issued a challenge. “Race you to Mr. Lytell’s. The loser has to buy the winner a drink.”

“I’d take you on but I didn’t bring any money,” Trixie said.

“Well, I guess you’re just going to have to win then,” Jim said.

Trixie took off like a shot with Jim in hot pursuit. Jim knew enough not to throw the race just so Trixie wouldn’t have to pay the bet. What surprised him was that she made the race close and in the end nudged him out when he pulled up before the finish line.

“You let me win,” Trixie accused good-naturedly.

“I most certainly didn’t,” he replied. “You won fair and square. Do you want a strawberry soda?”

“No thanks,” she said. “I still love the taste but I’m trying not to drink so much of it. I’d rather have some sparkling water.”

The two walked into the store. Mr. Lytell raised an eyebrow when he saw who had come in. He hadn’t forgotten what had happened to Trixie in March and was glad to see that she and Jim together. He quickly put on his stern face as they checked out, not letting on how pleased he was with this turn of events.

Trixie and Jim took their drinks outside.

“Do you want to drink these here or walk back to your house?” Jim asked.

“I probably should run back, but let’s walk instead. It will give us some time to talk.”

Trixie wasn’t sure what she wanted to talk about today. Maybe they’d just talk about day-to-day things and take it from there.

“So are you planning to go to the parade tomorrow?” she asked.

“I haven’t missed it for several years. It always brings me closer to my dad. He had been drafted and served in the Viet Nam conflict before he married Mom.”

“I forgot that your dad had been in the service. From what I’ve read about the Viet Nam Conflict, when the soldiers returned they were not treated very well.”

They began their walk back. “Dad didn’t talk about it much. I think he experienced such atrocities that he just couldn’t put them into words. I can remember when I was little waking up in the middle of the night and hearing Mom trying to comfort him. He never talked about it the next day but I sensed it had to do with that.”

“I guess my dad was pretty lucky then. He received his draft notice but he never got called up.”

The two walked in silence for a while. “What are you going to do for the next week or so before summer school begins?” Trixie asked.

“Well, I know it’s kind of early, since I’ve got to finish my undergraduate degree and as well as my graduate degree, but I want to do some research for the school. I’m hoping that by the time I get my doctorate, I’ll have everything in place to break ground.”

Trixie’s eyes lit up. She always loved hearing about Jim’s dream of starting a school for homeless kids. “That’s so exciting. Have you given any thought to where you want to build it?”

“I’ve thought about it a lot. Part of me wants to try to find a remote place where outside influences can be better controlled but then I think that I wouldn’t be doing anyone any favors by isolating them from the world. The more I think about it the more I’d like to build right here,” Jim explained.

“As Honey would say, that would be perfectly perfect,” Trixie exclaimed. “Sleepyside would open its arms to the school. If you could find some land outside of town you could have that privacy but be close to town so the children could experience the normalcy of that as well.”

Jim grabbed Trixie free hand as he continued, “Well, finding land shouldn’t be a problem. Dad and I have already talked about it. He thinks that the land adjacent to Ten Acres that he owns would be the perfect place to build a school. He’s even offered to donate all of the preserve to the school as well.”

The two continued their walk back to Crabapple Farm. While they didn’t solve any world problems or consciously work on the ones they had, Trixie felt like they made great progress. They really listened to what each other had to say. Jim realized that he didn’t have to try to solve Trixie’s problems. Sometimes she just needed a sounding board and she was able to talk things out.

Trixie confirmed that Jim had a lot of underlying issues that were bothering him and would continue to bother him. She was willing to listen but she knew speaking with a counselor would also help. It was something he had never done when the Wheelers had adopted him. Everyone had assumed he had no issues because he put on a great front. The trick would be trying to convince him it was okay to see one.

Brian’s mind was not on the book he was reading. Despite it being written by his favorite author, Tom Clancy’s Patriot Games was not holding his interest. Brian kept thinking back to the night before. He didn’t regret what happened one bit but he wondered how he and Honey had gone so fast from a little more than friends to almost lovers in less than twelve hours. The good thing was they were back together. He was the first to admit his suggestion to break up with Honey after the holidays was a big mistake.

He spent a lot of his spare time all semester wondering what Honey was doing and if she was dating anyone. He couldn’t ask Jim because he was caught up in his own misery. A misery that Brian felt somewhat responsible for since Jim and Trixie’s break up had been caused by an argument over his and Honey’s. He didn’t feel comfortable talking with Mart or Dan either, so he had just let his imagination run wild.

The first few weeks of the semester had been rough. It took all he had to keep focused on his studying and with second semester organic chemistry he needed it.

But that was all behind him; he and Honey seemed to be moving in the right direction and he didn’t want to go back to just holding hands. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to take their relationship to the next level either. After all, Honey was still a junior in high school. When he left for college, he was of the mind that you saved yourself for marriage. It had been what his parents taught him. Though, given that he was born just under nine months after his parents married, he wondered if they had.

Finally, after reading the same page four times and still not knowing what he read, he gave up. Honey would be coming down to the house in less than a half an hour. He would insist they work on her chemistry before they did anything else. He hoped he could keep his hands off of her. She had felt so right in his arms last night, like nothing he had ever experienced before. He didn’t think it was lust.

Brian headed downstairs and into the kitchen just as Honey poked her head through the kitchen door and yelled “Yoo-hoo!” It was a standing joke that Honey did this ever since the first time she had come down to Crabapple Farm, barged in without knocking, and then almost died of embarrassment.

“Yoo-hoo to you, too,” Brian called back as he made his way over to his girlfriend. He bent down and placed a chaste kiss on Honey’s lips.

Honey looked at him, confusion in her eyes.

Realizing how in tune he was to Honey, he whispered, “Later. If I kiss you like I want to, you’ll never get any studying done.”

Honey reached up and pulled Brian’s face down to hers. She captured his lips with hers and her tongue found its way into Brian’s mouth. As quickly as the kiss started, it ended. “That’s to give you something to look forward to while you help me study.”

The two had been working for about a half an hour. Brian hadn’t really been surprised that Honey had already understood most of the material. After all, both she and Trixie had been carrying a low A average all semester. If they did well on the final they would both end up with A’s in the class.

Honey slammed the book shut. “I’m glad you were able to explain that organic part to me. It was the only thing I hadn’t fully grasped.”

“It was my pleasure,” Brian said. “Would you like something to drink?”

Honey’s eyes sparkled. “No, I’d like to do some more chemistry experiments.” She gasped at what she had just voiced.

As much as Brian would have liked to taken Honey out to a secluded place and picked up where they had left off the night before, he knew they needed to have a discussion about their relationship.

“I think that can be arranged,” he started, “but first I’d think we should talk a bit. I don’t want our relationship to be focused on just the physical parts.”

Honey looked up at Brian with doubt in her eyes. “Okay,” she said slowly.

Immediately, he knew that he hadn’t explained himself very well. “Honey,” he said wanting to make sure he had her undivided attention. “I think we need to back up just a step or two and talk about what we want out of our relationship. You mean too much to me.”

He took her hand and led her outside to find a place where they could talk without interruption. He led her out into the orchard. As they passed the fresh grave, Brian stopped for a moment. Honey didn’t say anything, just squeezed his hand and stood by him until he was ready to move on.

When they were far enough into the orchard that no one would interrupt them, Brian stopped. Several years earlier Brian and his dad had made several benches that were placed in the orchard. It had become a haven for each of the Beldens at one time or another. Brian sat down on a bench and pulled Honey next to him. He couldn’t resist placing a kiss on her forehead before he began.

“I don’t know where to begin,” Brian started. “I just know that it feels so right to have you with me again. I made a huge mistake breaking up with you last winter.”

Honey looked confused. Their break up hadn’t been something sudden. They had talked about it for hours and they both had agreed that it was the best for them. That didn’t mean she hadn’t been miserable for half of the semester until she had been able to convince Brian they could at least be friends.

“We talked about it and both agreed it would be for the best,” Honey replied.

“I tried to convince myself that it was for the best but it wasn’t. I thought more about you and what I was missing and fretted about you dating other people. It was more of a distraction than dating you was.”

Honey looked hurt and said, “So I was a distraction.”

Brian quickly took her hands and tried to explain. “When we were dating it wasn’t a negative distraction. I loved that I knew you would be there for me and I would spend lots of time thinking about you and wanting to be with you. Knowing you were there, I would be able to concentrate on my studying. After we broke up, I had a hard time concentrating on my studies. It took all I could muster to keep my concentration up. My excuse for breaking up had been thrown right back in my face.”

Honey nodded her head in understanding. “So where does that leave us? I’ve still got another year of high school and next year you’re going to be even busier taking the MCAT and finishing up your degree.”

Brian pulled her into an embrace and said, “We’ve got the whole summer to figure it out. You’ve always been very understanding about my studies and never pressured me about how much time I should be spending with you. That always bothered me.”

“Brian, I never made a big deal about it because I know how important getting into med school is to you. Then, when you’re in your residency, it will be even harder. I decided a long time ago, quality time was much more important than the quantity of time spent together.”

The two talked for a while longer, discussing their plans for the summer and their relationship. Each agreed to be more open with their communication and to make plans to do things together that they hadn’t done in the past.

For several minutes, they discussed their plans for the summer.

“Do you have lots of students lined up for tutoring?” she asked.

Brian kept his arm wrapped around her as he replied. “I think enough to keep me busy. The classes I’m taking won’t be too hard and I want to enjoy the summer. Once med school starts, I’ll be even busier.”

“I’m looking forward to teaching swimming lessons and lifeguarding at the pool. I’m so glad I was able to get my Water Safety Instructor certificate as my P.E. requirement,” she commented. “I’m nervous though. I hope I can handle the kids.”

Brian placed a kiss on her forehead. “You’ll do great. You always had patience with Bobby. You’ll be having parents begging to have their children put in your classes.

Just about talked out, Honey reminded Brian, “I thought we were going to do some chemistry experiments.”

Brian carefully chose his words. “Honey, I wouldn’t change anything about yesterday, and our rendezvous in the kitchen is something I’ll never forget. I just don’t want in the heat of the moment to go further than either of us is ready for.

“Brian,” Honey assured. “I’m ready for anything you’re ready for.”

Brian moaned. On days like today, he wished he wasn’t so honorable and could just throw caution to the wind.

“Be careful what you wish for,” he said. “Parts of my body would like to take you up on that offer but I just can’t. I don’t want to pressure you and I want the first time we make love to not be worrying about who might walk in on us. I promise we will make love. I know people will say we’re too young to know what we want in our lives but I know we’re meant to be together. We’ve got the rest of our lives.”

Part of Honey was relieved by what Brian had said but another part was disappointed.

“That doesn’t mean you’re not willing to experiment, does it?” she asked hopefully.

Brian pulled Honey into his arms and responded, “My favorite position in baseball was second base.”

Brian gently kissed Honey’s face. He started at her forehead and worked his way down, kissing each eye, her upturned nose, her cheeks and finally he found his way to her mouth.

Honey couldn’t keep her hands to herself as his kisses assaulted her. She turned her entire body to face him and then straddled his legs kneeling on the bench so each could better access the other’s bodies. Honey placed her hands on either side of Brian and gripped the bench as she threw her head back giving him free access to her neck. She was wearing a pair of running shorts and a v-neck t-shirt. Brian placed his hands on her waist so she wouldn’t fall backward as he explored down her neck to the vee of her neckline with his lips.

While he would have liked to have spent hours making out with Honey, he knew they needed to straighten their clothes and get back to the house. He heard a twig snap and assumed it was just a rabbit or deer.

“We’ve got to go before someone comes looking for us,” she reluctantly said.

Brian stood up and then helped Honey to her feet. He spun her around to make sure there were no signs of their recent romp. Then he gave her one more searing kiss before they headed back to the house.

 

 

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